At first, he makes the person feel miserable. But then generously gives the opportunity to get rid of inferiority complexes by allowing to do him a favor, which is presented as a good thing.

Underestimation

`Others, look, without legs – and nothing` and `I wish I had your problems` – demonstration of indifference to others` concerns and worries.

`But you are smart` and `You were born that way`. After such phrases, it is hard to realize one`s attractiveness or notice invisible but existing talents.

`You want? You`ll get over it`, `I`m not talking to you` and `You have nothing here` – phrases that can make one believe in the unrealizability of personal desires and suppress them.

Criticizing

`No offense, but...` and `Learn to accept criticism` – as if good intentions to improve the other, but in reality, a good opportunity to humiliate them.

`But where are you going with your talents` and `This is only for your own good` – false care. In reality, it is a direct prohibition to develop. It is a way to tie to oneself. These are fears of losing the person, because when they become better, they can attach to people of a different level.

`But Peter does it better` – comparison with another perfectly lowers self-esteem.

`You get offended forever` and `It`s just a joke` – a way to offend and not admit it.

Ageism

`Live as long as I have`, `Don`t argue with elders` - instilling the idea of incompetence.

`Grow up`, `What are you like a little one` and `Come on, more seriously`. For those who have run out of arguments to prove their rightness, all that remains is to turn to the other side and refer to the opponent`s frivolous attitude towards the issue being discussed.

`You need to know how to adapt`, `Others at your age already...` and `It`s high time to understand that...` – artificial creation of behavior norms for each age.

Guilt

`I raised you with these hands`, `Gave my best years`, `Devoted my whole life to you`. The feeling of guilt creates a sense of unfulfilled duty, which in turn prompts action.

Shame

`Be a man` and `Don`t be a wimp`. To match their gender in others` eyes, people are ready to do a lot. And manipulators use that.

`Let`s do without snot` and `Pull yourself together, rag` - prohibition of emotions.

`Look at yourself` and `What will people say?` – inducing dependence on public opinion.

`You are such an egoist` translates to: `My desires are more important than yours`. Accustoming to self-sacrifice, unreasonable disregard for one`s own interests and needs.

Intimidation

`You are already thirty` and `But when will there be children?` - evoking a feeling of not meeting standards.

`You`ll go sweep the streets`, `You`ll end your life on the panel` and `Study to be a lawyer and do what you want` – evoking fear of the future, in which you can be a failure if you don`t act according to the manipulator`s instructions.

Passive aggression

`Guess what I`m offended about`, `You should have guessed it` and `I know what you meant by that` – labeling as a telepath, which allows refusing explanations for the other`s unguessed thoughts and feelings.

`But you always` and `But you never` – a reproach that acts as an indelible stamp and evokes feelings of inevitability of the situation, hopelessness, apathy, and passive aggression.

`But I told you`, `But what difference does it make now` and `Oh, that`s it!` – short phrases to reinforce the feeling of injustice.

`No, everything is fine, just...` – sweet understatement to the end. A phrase behind which is encrypted: `You did something wrong, guess what`.

Sowing doubt

`It wasn`t like that at all`, `I never said that`, `It wasn`t me, but you`, `You made it up`, `It seemed to you` and `You forgot, but I remember` and `You are lying everything` – accusations and denials, after which one can start doubting the correctness of one`s opinion and get confused in explanations.

Non-acceptance

`I want you to be` - a hint that the way you are does not satisfy.

`People like you need...` – directing towards action while hiding behind the necessity to self-improve.

`Be above that` and `Be simpler` – accustoming to disabling defense mechanisms in critical situations and searching for their causes.

`It`s impossible to talk to you` - means unwillingness to reach a compromise and shifting the responsibility for it onto the other.

Recognizing a manipulator means disarming them. Their true motives differ from those they declare. Finding out about them is the first task for those who want to shield themselves from negative influence.

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