1. Technique

If someone is yelling at you, force yourself to stay calm, remaining unshaken. Your behavior will provoke anger in the yeller, but it will quickly fade. It will be replaced by a feeling of guilt for their provocative and aggressive behavior. Most likely, the yeller will be the one to ask for forgiveness.

2. Technique

Another interesting technique for the correct reaction to a yeller is offered by psychologist Mikhail Litvak in his famous book `Psychological Aikido`. If someone is yelling at you, you need to focus your gaze on something – for example, on the opponent`s buttons. To the question: `What are you looking at` you can reply like this: `I`m counting the buttons – I always do that when I want to kill someone, but it`s better to refrain.` The yeller`s confusion will help end the scene not friendly, but quietly and without escalation.

3. Technique
If you know that you will hear criticism from a person, gather your courage and try to sit or stand next to them – at that moment they will become calmer and much less negativity will come out from them than if you were at a distance.

4. Technique

This technique is suitable in cases where it`s important to maintain good relations with the critic. Mikhail Litvak offers it in the book `Psychological Aikido`. First, you need to elevate the partner`s importance. For example, `Yes, it really turned out foolishly. Thank you for drawing my attention – your opinion is important to me.` Then combine the criticism with the constructive, using negative questioning. For example, they tell you that you ruined everything. Ask what the worst thing that happened, what it threatens, how it can be fixed – gradually you will get to a specific advice, for which you can thank them.

5. Technique

And two more techniques (5 and 6) from Litvak. If the criticism is empty, ignore it. The reaction will depend on how important the interlocutor is to you. If there`s a need to preserve the relationship, avoid repeating their words in any way – respond in the spirit of `I understand your opinion, but I`ll do it this way` as many times as necessary. If the opponent is not that important, you can silently ignore.

6. Technique

Amortize non-constructive criticism with `fog`. Fog in this case is a stream of phrases and words that have no special meaning, but create the impression for the interlocutor of a correct reaction to the criticism. For example, they tell you that you didn`t send the report on time yesterday. Use one of several types of foggy amortization.

Agreement in principle: `Yes, you`re right, employees shouldn`t miss deadlines, everyone needs to work more accurately and honestly.`
Agreement with the strange. Sometimes the critic uses axioms – banal or strange, to which responding you can simply avoid direct criticism of you. For example, they say: `Delaying the submission of the report is unacceptable, you could have asked someone for advice if you couldn`t handle it!` But you reply: `Yes, perhaps I need to work on my technique of asking questions.`

Amortization with axioms. It`s useful to have constructions at hand, by varying which you can avoid most non-constructive criticism. For example: `All people are different`, `Everyone lives differently`, `All people react differently to events`, `Everyone is right in their own way`, `Some work effects will be visible only after time`, `Different qualities of goods have different prices` and so on.

7. Technique

When you`re worried, try to force yourself to breathe calmly and balance your heartbeat. We really are capable of controlling our stress with even breathing.